Crafting an effective fundraising letter can seem like a daunting task, and if you’re like many development directors you probably hate staring at a blank screen wondering where to begin. Fundraising letters aren’t like other writing — you’re writing to get results and to get people to care enough to open their checkbooks. Considering most people spend fewer than eleven seconds with each piece of mail (and that’s if they open it) you’re up against some serious odds.

While most people begin by writing down the “elevator pitch” for their organization, I always advise beginning with a story in mind of someone who benefitted from your services. Make the case of what you do and why you’re worth supporting through one person’s story.

Here are a few other tips to help improve your letters:

1. Use a Photo

Studies show that a photograph of one person, where you can see their eyes, increases effectiveness in direct mail fundraising. People give to people, as Mal Warwick would say, and a picture is worth a thousand words. Don’t be afraid to use a photo of one person in your materials, and print it right on the letter.

2. Don’t Bury the Ask

Organizations do this all the time! They “build up” their story and bury the request, in passive language, in the last paragraph. Don’t do this! Most readers skim, and they want to know right away what your letter is about. Be upfront, and ask for a gift within the first two paragraphs. Bold and Underline your request. That’s why you’re writing. It also breaks up the text and helps people read quickly.

3. The Donor is the Hero, Not the Organization

Flip your usual script, where people/students/the world is in trouble but thankfully your organization is there – it’s not about you, it’s about your donors. Let them know that without them, the work can’t get done. Their gifts keep your good work happening. Make them feel important — they are!

4. Use Emotional Language Twice as Much as Facts

People give to solve problems, right wrongs, and support their beliefs. Contrary to opinion, emotion is the primary motivator to make a decision — facts are only accessed to justify and support the emotional decision. You’re not going to “reason” somebody into making a gift with statistics and figures in a letter. Make your pitch in language that tugs at the heart.

5. Add a P.S. With a Direct Ask

Studies show that when reading a letter, people will first skim their name, then down to the bottom to see who sent the letter — a PostScript will stand out and is shown to be effective in getting people to go back to the top and read the letter more carefully. Summarize your ask in the PS, and you’ll see your return rate increase.

6. It’s Not About What You Like

You, dear development director, are not your typical donor. You know your mission inside and out; you care about it and can talk it up with anyone, anywhere (that’s why you have the job that you do!) But your personal tastes and preferences may not be what works. With a direct mail piece you’re trying to get people to open the letter, read it, pay attention, and care enough by the end of it to make a contribution. The average person who responds to direct mail is looking for a few specific items in each piece (is this organization trustworthy? Do they match my concerns? Will my gift matter? Are they effective? Will I make a difference?). There is an art and a science to effective direct mail pieces, but often the hardest thing to do is put aside personal preferences and try something new when it comes to asking for a gift through the mail.

Fundraising letters are a unique animal, but there are tried and true methods that make them work. Put these six tips into practice and you’ll see your return rate increasing and your appeals becoming more effective. Of course, you can always contact the Killoe Group to help you craft a truly great fundraising letter. We’re happy to put our experience to use for your organization to build a stronger donor base and raise more money with your direct mail appeals.

About the author

Paul McAvoy is The Killoe Group’s Communications & Marketing Lead. He is a career development professional who believes in the power of great storytelling to build success in public relations, fundraising communications, and non-profit marketing. His writing has been featured in the Albany Times Union, The New Hampshire Union Leader, The Evangelist, Parable Magazine, and The Long Island Catholic, among others.